6 Degrading Summer Jobs and the Celebs Who Worked Them

It’s raining men! And, apparently, character-driven dramas of a Steven Soderbergh/Channing Tatum symbiosis. Magic Mike hits the silver screen today, and Adonis fans everywhere are reeling with excitement. But conventionally attractive hard-bodies aren’t the only thing you’ll see in Magic Mike. Looks like you’ll see a mess of Soderbergh-driven personal closure, too. Tatum, who used to strip before his success, is calling the film his stripper "swan song," and has let the press know that he "will never do or talk anything about stripping after this ever, ever again." So, there you have it. With the release of a huge stripper movie, Chippendale-ing has cycled its way off of Channing Tatum’s résumé. And what other celebrity summer jobs would they have you forget? We’ve found six pretty degrading gigs, and the celebrities that had them.

1. Al Pacino, European Gigolo

   Strippers might have to bare all and gyrate their flesh so that desperate, paying customers can get their jollies, but the world’s oldest profession has tip-based naked dancing beat. Many stars are rumored to have hooked for money before making it big, and Al Pacino flat out owns it. "At 20," the actor has confessed, "I lived in Sicily by selling the only asset I had — my body. An older woman traded food and housing in return for sex. I woke mornings not really loving myself." Similar to how everyone feels the morning after watching The Godfather: Part III, no doubt.
   

2. Buzz Lightyear, Cocaine Trafficker

   In October 1978, future family movie star and then-struggling comedian Tim Allen was arrested at the Kalamazoo/Battle Creek International Airport. Too bad he didn’t have plastic wings popping out of his suit that day — the funnyman was trying to fly a commercial airline with a marginally epic ’70s style porno ‘stache, and a pound and a half of cocaine. With a lifetime of prison on the horizon, Allen negotiated a two-year sentence by ratting out every drug peddler he knew in The Great Lakes area … and beyond. The snitch got off without a hitch, and the rest is history. Talk about "falling with style."
   

3. Whoopi Goldberg, Make-Up Artist (To Corpses)

   Whoopi Goldberg is no stranger to odd jobs. She was a dishwasher and phone sex operator before she was a brilliant comedy legend, talk show host, and Maggie Smith’s least favorite nun. Her weirdest job? Applying cosmetics to dead bodies to prepare them for public viewing. No wonder she did so well in Ghost, as the star is no stranger to facing mortality. Another fun fact? It’s been said that she chose her stage name "Whoopi" because she’s a frequent flatulator during gigs. Smells like money to us!
   

4. Donald Trump, Recycler of Trash

   The rumors are true: recycling is not just for homeless people and Boy Scouts. Real estate mogul and infamous gas bag Donald Trump began his working life by recycling bottles. Never one to throw away an opportunity for profit, the Apprentice creator and comb-over pro bagged up hundreds of glass bottles to turn them in for the paltry 5 cent reward. Although he’s not an environmentalist today, Trump clearly knows what it’s like to squeeze a nickel out of anything.
   

5. David Lee Roth, Bedpan Cleaner

   Legendary Van Halen frontman (with an impressive four-octave range) David Lee Roth was an orderly in a hospital before penning the masterpiece featured below, "I’m Just A Gigolo." Although the shock rocker has a flamboyant, effortlessly ’80s persona, he put in some time wearing scrubs and emptying bedpans. And it’s no wonder: shoveling crap seems the perfect preparation for being a member of Van Halen.
   

6. Matthew McConaughey, Chicken Coop Scooper

   Channing Tatum’s scantily clad co-star, Matthew McConaughey, is also an alumnus of a degrading job — other than playing a stripper named Dallas in a Steven Soderbergh picture. While living in Australia, the Austin-based actor cleaned chicken coops to support himself before taking on bigger and better work (like taking off his clothes in front of a camera for a boatload of cash). Ever cleaned a chicken coop, or seen a dirty one? Here’s what you need to know: it’s gross — super gross — and you don’t envy him. Not in the least. Not for that.
   

This entry was posted on Thursday, June 28th, 2012 at 9:30 pm and is filed under Features. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.